Fancy went out of town recently for her mother in laws funeral and asked that I watch her fat cats and hold down the fort until she returns. Long story short her trip sucked and she called me several times in tears and devastated. The things she had to put up with were really heart breaking! I knew her coming home to a whirl wind of laundry and legos would be overwhelming and the last thing she needed. So I took it upon myself to call our friend Carne Asada, go over to Fancy's house and clean it. Little did I know what we would be in for.
I finally get to tell the worlds best story about Fancy!!! I've been waiting for this moment since the day I met her I think.
So Carne and I are in Fancy's room folding laundry and boxing stuff up so she could get the hell out of dodge when she came home. First of all I just want every one to know Fancy has a ton of necklaces that I've never seen her wear....the mexican in me really wanted to steal of a few of the blingy ones!!! Oh and she has five million pairs of shoes and about six billion belts that I've never seen her wear either. I would say she is a closeted Diva but we all know she is definitely not a closeted anything. BELIEVE ME!
I failed to mention that Carne and I neglected out children in the backyard so we could do all of this. At some point Carne left to check on all of our kids that we sent outside and while she was gone I found something that brought my friendship with Fancy to a entirely new level. Next to Fancy's bed was a tote of what I though was just laundry and random crap. I figured we could use the tote to put shoes in and started to empty it out. I took out a bunch of papers, a little laundry and a bag of Christmas ginger snaps! Let me remind you all that it is now May....really Fancy Christmas ginger snaps? That's not even the best part. I lifted up the bag of ginger snaps and there it was A GIANT, (pale the way Fancy likes it)SKIN COLORED, VEINY, VIBRATOR!!!!
I just sat there for a second and laughed to myself. Fancy's hasn't been "fancied" in a while so I couldn't judge her. I just relished the moment because at that point knew what my next tripple nipple blog post was going to be about. I must be a true friend right?! I put the bag of Christmas ginger snaps back into its place and decided to go leave the tote for Fancy to go through when she got home.
I wish I could say the blog stops there but it gets even better!!!
Carne comes back and we start going through the mounds of jeans Fancy has at the top of her closet. Seriously Fancy four pairs of jeans just isn't enough is it?! Such a Diva!
Back to my story.
Back to my story.
Carne reaches up pulls down a few pairs of jeans when all of the sudden a PURPLE VIBRATOR comes flying out and hits her in the head! At this point I lost it, I laughed until I nearly went into labor. This made the entire day of service that much more worth it!!! While Carne Asada recovered on the floor I told her about the other one in the tote and we continued to laugh and laugh for what seemed like hours. Then we decided to put all sex toys away in a secret BEWARE box so Fancy's family wouldn't find them when they came to move her things to her new duplex. I am the greatest friend in the entire world!
I text Fancy about our finds and her reply was, "I've been looking for that vibrator for awhile, don't worry its clean." Luckily for Fancy Carne and I weren't overly surprised. Like I said Fancy isn't a closeted anything especially when it comes to sex. She takes pride in her mojo like anyone with the nickname Fancy would.
Because of this experience I've decided to do more service for my fellow friends. Not only was it uplifting to do something kind for my bestie it was pretty damn entertaining! Thanks Fancy for the good laugh, Carne and I will never forget the flying vibrators!
