Celibacy Blows

I realize that's a confusing title, but I have now been celibate for nearly a month!  I don't see an end in sight to this new lifestyle, which is SO DAMN FRUSTRATING!!!  Now I know what it's like to have the 3 year itch, but mine is more like a 3 week itch!   I see a perfectly capable weiner who eats dinner at my table, but yet he sleeps across the hall.  Why oh why am I celibate?  I guess I better stock up on batteries and lube, oh wait, I'm so horny I don't even need the lube!  I wonder what N3 does?  She has been celibate even longer.  N2, I want no comments from you.  Obviously you're doing the deed because you have a bun in the oven.  I personally think I just need a super hot guy who is willing because let me tell ya, I'M READY!