Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The Tall Tales of Paul Bunyan Saga #2

Paul Bunyan verses Hue Jass

One night Fancy and Whiskey were sitting on Fancy's couch posing as Hue Jass.  We commented on Babe's facebook wall and said, "Hey Babe, when are you leaving Paul for me?"  Paul commented, calling out Whiskey and Whiskey only, about how inappropriate he thought the comment was.

**Side Note, is it just me or is he overly-sensitive?  Could it be that because he cheated on his wife, he has insecurity issues with the fact that she, the bread winner and way more accomplished one in the marriage, might up and leave him with NOTHING?  

Whiskey sent Babe a text message because she didn't have Paul's number, to clarify that a) it was a joke b) there were two people involved, and no need to call whiskey out, especially when we asked Babe not to reveal our identities c) Paul Bunyan is insecure and a huge over-reactor  d) Babe could have freaking deleted the comment if she thought that her husband would be offended e) Babe could have just unfriended Hue Jass or even option f) send "Hue Jass" a message saying she thought that was inappropriate.  Unfortunately, Babe did NONE of these options, and therefore, Whiskey had to receive the brunt of Paul Bunyan's unnecessary crazy-ass-ness.

Babe replied that she didn't want to get involved, and then Paul got on Babe's phone and told Whiskey that it didn't matter who said it, it was still inappropriate.  Whiskey apologized and thought the entire situation was over. 

A few weeks later, Babe made it clear to Fancy that Paul Bunyan, for whatever reason, doesn't like Whiskey, and she knows that Whiskey doesn't really like Paul Bunyan, even though Whiskey never even admitted that, well to the Bunyan's anyway.  Babe knew full well that Fancy and Whiskey are like Peanut and Jelly on a sandwich, and that Fancy would tell Whiskey, and that is the reason that she even told Fancy.  She wanted to make sure that Whiskey knew the truth, that Paul doesn't care for Whiskey. 

That same week, Paul Bunyan, who just couldn't let it rest, went Home Teaching to Little Papa and had to bring it up, yet again, and the fact that he felt like Whiskey was ignoring him.  How high school is this, really?!  Little Papa, being the peacemaker that he is, tried to let PB know that they were full aware that Paul doesn't like Whiskey, and that Whiskey has the right to be upset with some things that Paul has done in relation to their little whiskey children.  Paul Bunyan again, being insecure, took it as Whiskey thinking he is horrible with all children, when in fact, she just didn't appreciate his over bearing nature with hers. 

**Side Note--Paul Bunyan, the creepy stay at home dad, thinks he is God's gift to child rearing. 

Long Story Short, Paul Bunyan and Babe came after Whiskey (and her unborn baby, Whiskey Jr #1) and wouldn't let up.  Neither can accept any small amount of criticism, even when they ask Whiskey directly why she is upset.  Because of this, Whiskey made the wise decision, and that she's a big girl and doesn't need their friendship. 

Whiskey had to end their friendship, but really, if you can't handle a little criticism in friendship, we're not really friends anyway.

2 comments:

  1. I bet he chews his kids food first. And he's one of those "gluten-free" freaks. GIVE ME GLUTEN OR GIVE ME DEATH!

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  2. If you ever go back to the Bunyans, you should look for multiple notebooks/notepads with mysterious code that you can't understand. I can already tell you what it means. S-solid. R-(runny)I'd rather not describe. NP-(noseplugged) overbearingly pungeant. C-had corn for dinner last night huh? x1-one time x2-twice x3-ran like the mississippi.

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