The Tall Tales of Paul Bunyan

The Back Story of Paul Bunyan

Princess Charming first introduced Tassels to Paul Bunyan and his wife, Babe the Blue Ox.  In turn, Tassels introduced Fancy and Whiskey to Babe, and eventually to Paul Bunyan.  Basically I am pissed at Princess and Charming and Tassels for making us acquainted with Paul and Babe. 

Past Incident #1
At a farewell BBQ for Princess Charming, hosted at the Bunyan's home, Paul came running in with a screaming PB Jr #1 shouting for Babe to grab some ice quick.  He rushed to the freezer, grabbed a bag of frozen vegetables slammed them right into the floor with all of his might, and shouted, "(child's name, as Whiskey and Tassel's have a child with the same name) pushed PB Jr #1  into the street and he cracked his head open!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

**Side Note, this was said with volume, panic, and enthusiasm!

Whiskey, Tassels, and Princess Charming jumped up to investigate which of their children had actually brutally assaulted PB Jr #1. 

Babe rushed to Paul's side, telling him that he needed to calm down.  Little PB Jr #1 was the injured one, and yet Paul Bunyan was the one getting all the attention because he was so worked up. 

Little Papa, Whiskey's husband, happened to be outside and witnessed the whole thing.  When Whiskey and the others arrived outside, he informed them that it was in fact Whiskey Jr. #2 who committed the crime.  The real story went something like this...PB Jr #1 and Whiskey Jr #2 were running, when PB Jr #1 stopped, and Whiskey Jr. #2 didn't, resulted in the accidental, gentle bumping down of PB Jr. #1.  A tiny goose egg, the size of a freckle was the only evidence (aside from PB's meltdown) that an incident had even occurred. 

**Side Note--when this started going down, Fancy slunk away to the basement and began cleaning up the toy room and putting the foam alphabet puzzle back together because she knew that if they flipped out over an accidental knock down, then they may not appreciate a messy toy room.  Plus, Fancy doesn't like confrontation and Paul Bunyan made the entire atmosphere effing awkward!!

Once the environment settled down, Little Papa pulled Paul aside and let him know that he lost it, and that made the situation out of control.  Had he remained calm, then it wouldn't have been so out of control.  He told him it was an accident, which is clearly what it was when two year old children are involved.