"I'm Not Jealous or Anything..."

Tassles here. Dramatic interactions with Princess Charming have started to slow way down, which is a good thing. However, after all the crap he put me through in the past year, I do feel completely justified in stirring the pot every once in a while. Case in point- a few weeks ago Princess and I decided to take our kids up to visit their grandma in Idaho for the weekend.  The night before the trip I texted Princess to tell him that I had been in contact with his best friend from high school (we’ll call him Prince… since he likes girls, not boys) and that we were planning to get together Sunday night.

*Side Note: Prince and I were never really friends until Princess decided to show his true rainbow colors. At that point Prince e-mailed me to offer support. A few months later, his wife sprung a divorce on him. So I followed suite and offered a nice supportive message for him too. We’ve e-mailed casually back and forth since. Most of our conversations have included topics like cars, jobs, and kids. A little flirting here and there, but really we’re both recently divorced, heartbroken, baggage carrying emotional wrecks right now.

Here’s how Princess and my text conversation went down:

P: I didn’t know you and Prince were talking. (From the beginning of our break-up Princess said really douche bag disguised as supportive things “All I want is for you to be happy. I can’t wait for you to find the man of your dreams.” TRANSLATION: “I know I pursued you, and made eternal commitments to honor and cherish you as my wife, but I’m kind of over that now. Sorry. I do want you to find someone though, so I don’t have to feel so bad about it forever.” Thanks Princess Douche Bag…)

T: Yeah, we’ve exchanged e-mails for a couple of months now.

P: It’s just weird that you two arranged a get together and not him and me. (At this point I know that Princess is starting to get uncomfortable… J)

T: We were going to be in town, and I thought it would be nice to see him.

P: Have you guys been flirting, or is this just a friend thing? (Totally just a friend thing, but I am so enjoying that Princess is weirded out.)

T: Um, neither of us would be talking if we were still married. But I’m pretty sure we’re just supporting each other.

P: It’s fine if you are flirting. I’m not jealous or anything. But he didn’t even ask me. (At this point, I am dying laughing. As if anyone needs to ask Princess’s permission to date me… I thought about turning it into a fight, but then again I needed to ride in a car with him for four hours tomorrow. Instead I’ll just take absolute joy in knowing that he is uncomfortable and play it off like I didn’t see the last part.)

T: We just decided to meet tonight. That’s why I’m letting you know now.

P: Prince is a great man. Attractive, kind, and funny. But he has a terrible history with money and he is recently divorced. I’ve known him for almost 20 years now. (Priceless. His jealousy is almost palpable. He wants to say nice things, but just can’t resist throwing in some jabs at his High School best friend who he is assuming is trying to get with his ex-wife.)

T: I agree. He is a nice man. Thanks for being cool.

We met up with Prince that Sunday night and all three of us spent several hours playing the Wii and a card game. I made extra sure to sit next to Prince during the card game and to give him a lingering hug goodbye. Princess’s expression during the hug was pure GOLD! To make matters even better, I met up with one of my friends a few nights later (her gay ex-husband and my gay ex-husband are roommates). She said, “So, I was over at the house the night that you and Princess were having the conversation about you and his best friend. He kept pacing around the house and kept reiterating to me, ‘I’m not jealous or anything, but…’” Yeah Princess, not jealous at all…